by: Jeremy Gislason
Ever wonder how some people can work under pressure and still have a smile on their face? Or how some people remain genuinely pleasant, even though their plans don’t exactly push through? The answer is simple. These people know the secret to happiness despite having problems.
You must be thinking. Good for them. They must have a really nice job, a high-paying salary, a generous boss and a wonderful work environment. It’s not that difficult to find happiness when you can easily pay your bills or when you have your dream job. How does this concern me? I only have a regular job, a regular pay, a crappy cubicle and an even crappier superior… How do I turn my life around for the better?
Well, the answer lies in you yourself. Don’t sound so surprised. You don’t need all those grand dreams to be happy where you are. Those rewards will come in time. Believe it or not, you can achieve happiness despite any problems that may come your way.
How Do You Deal With Your Situation?
The first thing you have to do to achieve happiness despite problems is to accept your situation. Don’t pine for the lives of others. If you keep on looking at your neighbor’s grass, you’ll only strain your neck and miss out on possibly finding happiness in your own garden.
Take the time to see where you’re at. And I mean, really look at what you have. Everyone has something of value. Whether it’s in the form of connections, of friends, of insights or of opportunities, everyone has something worthy. Be grateful for the things you have.
Accepting what you have allows you to see things clearer. Instead of spending the day grousing about your job, take a few minutes to appreciate the positive elements in it. Despite having a stingy boss, don’t you find solace in your fellow employees? Despite earning salaries at minimum rate, aren’t you picking up a lot of invaluable work experience?
There are a lot of things you should be grateful for. If you have a family, be thankful that you’re all still together. If you have a roof over your head, be grateful for that, too.
There’s an Ancient Persian quote that says: “I wept because I had no shoes, until I saw a man who had no feet.” This goes to show that even though you think you’re burdened with problems, you should still count your blessings and show your appreciation towards what you have, no matter how trivial you might think they are.
Do You Know Your Own Purpose?
One of the key steps to achieving happiness despite having problems is to discover what your purpose or contribution is to your family, society, or company. For example, your job isn’t just a grueling 9-5 routine. It serves a bigger purpose. Without your job, the company would not be able to function well. Find the meaning behind your work and you’ll soon find yourself motivated to perform your best. You’ll have a better reason to wake up every morning and you’ll have more energy to complete the tasks assigned to you.
Think about firefighters for example. Why do you think men and women on the fire brigade are so passionate about their jobs? Obviously, it’s not the safest occupation in the world. But if you ask many of these brave individuals, they’ll tell you one common thing. Lives are at stake. It’s their duty to save as many lives as they can. Firefighters are clear about what they’re supposed to do. They help others. Period.
The problem with most people who are unhappy with their way of life is that they don’t know what they’re supposed to do. Sure, they have a list of tasks to fulfill and they might even finish the list promptly, but as to what their purpose in life is… Their mind draws a blank.
Think about your job. Think about the people closest to you. When you think about others for a change, you might be surprised at how easy the answers will come to you.
How Big A Difference Does A Small Step Make?
Achieving happiness despite being surrounded by problems doesn’t call for you to take grand leaps of faith. Not all the time, anyway. Even a small act of kindness can uplift your day. A quiet shift of thought can do miracles for your mood. And even a small dose of sugary confections can change your world entirely.
Everything you need to turn your life around is in your hands. Everything is just a matter of perception. When you’re unhappy, you tend to ignore the little things. You finish your cup of coffee at an alarming rate and hurry back to your desk with a frown on your face.
For once, why don’t you take your time in the snack room and savor the aroma of your coffee? Even ten minutes of peace can have an impact on the rest of your day. Take time to appreciate the beauty that surrounds you. Or call an old friend to meet with you for lunch.
Achieving happiness despite problems is not a difficult thing; and yet so many people seem to have a hard time with it. While there’s no such thing as a perfect world, you always have full control over yourself, your attitude and your mindset.
Is Yoga Right for You?
A lot of women perform yoga exercises not just to lose weight or maintain proper body weight but also because they want to be healthy emotionally and mentally. Yoga is also known to contribute to the decrease of a number of problems during menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause. There is research to prove this, but it’s easy to see the physical, mental, and emotional benefits evident on those women who practice yoga.
Yoga Helps You Cope with a Busy Lifestyle
If you are still undecided about yoga, then there are a number of things about it that will help you decide. One of these is its relevance to today’s world, even if it is one of the most ancient practices of all times.
Yoga is considered as the perfect solution that helps women cope with their busy days and the resulting mental and physical stress. This is especially true if they are working moms who need to deal with the pressures of both work and home. Sitting behind a desk or even driving a car for several hours every day would already result in a woman’s having shoulder and back problems that will not only affect their lives at the office but also at home when they are dealing with the family and household chores.
Choosing the Best Yoga Style Helps
Deciding if yoga is really right for you would also require you to choose the yoga style that will fit your lifestyle, personality, and needs. If you are a working mom, your yoga needs might differ from those women who are just working at the office for long hours every day. As such, it is very important to find the perfect teacher or trainer who has the right knowledge about yoga who is not only qualified and accredited but also compassionate and sensitive to what you really need.
Yoga Styles:
1)Vini Yoga. This is a personal practice that could be developed through the incorporation of meditation, proper breathing, and posture as well as prayer and rituals. The amount of all these aspects that could be incorporated into your yoga practice will have to be changed though as a woman and her needs change and develop. Therefore, if you are still a student or a young professional, then the physical aspects of yoga might be more important for you, while older women might focus more on the spiritual, mental, and emotional aspects.
2)Ashtanga Yoga. Also considered as the power yoga, this style is known to be flowing and athletic. Breathing is very important in this yoga style as a woman flows through a series of postures. This is able to generate a lot of sweat and body heat, thus helping women detoxify their bodies.
3)Ananda Yoga. This yoga style makes use of temperate poses. This is gently meditative and perfect for those who would like to practice a yoga style that helps them to look inwards so they can focus on making their emotions better.
by: James Pendergraft
Yoga Helps You Cope with a Busy Lifestyle
If you are still undecided about yoga, then there are a number of things about it that will help you decide. One of these is its relevance to today’s world, even if it is one of the most ancient practices of all times.
Yoga is considered as the perfect solution that helps women cope with their busy days and the resulting mental and physical stress. This is especially true if they are working moms who need to deal with the pressures of both work and home. Sitting behind a desk or even driving a car for several hours every day would already result in a woman’s having shoulder and back problems that will not only affect their lives at the office but also at home when they are dealing with the family and household chores.
Choosing the Best Yoga Style Helps
Deciding if yoga is really right for you would also require you to choose the yoga style that will fit your lifestyle, personality, and needs. If you are a working mom, your yoga needs might differ from those women who are just working at the office for long hours every day. As such, it is very important to find the perfect teacher or trainer who has the right knowledge about yoga who is not only qualified and accredited but also compassionate and sensitive to what you really need.
Yoga Styles:
1)Vini Yoga. This is a personal practice that could be developed through the incorporation of meditation, proper breathing, and posture as well as prayer and rituals. The amount of all these aspects that could be incorporated into your yoga practice will have to be changed though as a woman and her needs change and develop. Therefore, if you are still a student or a young professional, then the physical aspects of yoga might be more important for you, while older women might focus more on the spiritual, mental, and emotional aspects.
2)Ashtanga Yoga. Also considered as the power yoga, this style is known to be flowing and athletic. Breathing is very important in this yoga style as a woman flows through a series of postures. This is able to generate a lot of sweat and body heat, thus helping women detoxify their bodies.
3)Ananda Yoga. This yoga style makes use of temperate poses. This is gently meditative and perfect for those who would like to practice a yoga style that helps them to look inwards so they can focus on making their emotions better.
by: James Pendergraft
Being Spiritual
How do I become spiritual? Is being a spiritual person like being religious? Should I leave my church or renounce my faith if I want to be more spiritual? Do I have to give up my personal possessions if I want to be a spiritual person? Will I have to give up my friends? What do spiritual people do for fun?
There is nothing you need to add to yourself to become spiritual, in fact you already are spiritual. You only have to connect to that higher part of who you truly are. The word spiritual comes from the word spirit, or soul. Your soul is completely independent from your physical body and exists before, during and after the physical body expires. So you have and always will be…spirit.
Some people decide spirituality is not for them because they are unfamiliar with what it actually means to Be Spiritual. They have preconceived beliefs about what it means to be spiritual either from books they have read or maybe they heard others speak about spirituality in a way that seemed to conflict with their own instilled beliefs.
Being spiritual and being religious are not quite the same, but they do have some things in common. For example, both spiritual and religious people have unshakable Faith in a power greater then themselves. They trust that there is a master plan and we all play a very important role in that plan. The stronger their faith and trust in that higher power, the more confident they are in life and happier they feel.
In spirituality, there are no boundaries; no limits and we realize we are all powerful beyond belief. In religion though, you must believe certain things because it is written, in a follow the leader sort of way. Belief in oneself and your own abilities may be limited because man made rules need to be followed to fit in with that particular dioceses.
Spiritual people are constantly within their church, the body is their temple; where as in religion you have a special building where you go to worship.
The biggest and most important aspect for both spiritual and religious people is the beliefs that there is only One God, a Divine Creator, a higher power greater then humanity that gives life and delivered us here - all together. To believe this makes it irrelevant whether you are a Baptist, Christian, Muslim, a Spiritual Healer, Saint or sinner - or any other label you choose. We are all connected to this higher power and It is connected to everyone of us.
Being spiritual does not mean you have to give up any possessions what so ever. The opposite is true. To feel joy in receiving is a perfectly natural process and to deny this part of your existence in this world is nothing short of sin. We are here to enjoy life, to feel happiness and to experience as many things as we can possibly experience. We were created for that one single purpose, to have the desire to receive all that the Source has to offer.
It can be compared to the story of a young man who spotted an elderly lady at a busy crosswalk. He really wanted to help her cross the street but the harder he tried to help, the more resistance he got from the lady. After a few minutes of trying to persuade the woman to take what he wanted to give, she got visibly upset, and she told him to leave her alone! She didn’t want to cross the street at all, she was just waiting to catch the bus.
So you see, for any genuine giving to take place, there needs to be receiver as well as a giver.
Being spiritual has nothing to do with giving up your current friends, but being open to adopting new friends can help you along your quest. Every single person in your life, even those who you meet on the street has something they could teach you. Whether it is patience, wisdom, love, or they have a message for you from the Source, to deny anyone to be who they are is to deny yourself of real growth.
Having fun comes in as many forms as there are interests. Being spiritual doesn’t mean you have to give up the fun in life and be serious all the time…no way! It’s all about the fun, and spiritual people have fun all the time. The joy they feel and see in others is a part of the fun to them. They aren’t waiting for a particular time of day or special occasion to have fun or to be happy; this is constant in their lives. Playing games, cracking jokes and making people laugh are important for everyone, not just the party animals.
Spiritual people can still enjoy a nice glass of wine or mug of beer, but they don’t feel the need to over indulge because they do not suffer, they have nothing to hide or run away from. Even the Kabbalists suggest getting drunk just once in awhile. They say it helps people to relax, loosen up, let go, dance and be happy during one of the most negative days of the year.
Being Spiritual is about being an even better person then you are already, to give more of yourself then others expect from you, to be overfilled with life and wonder, and to experience joy everyday. To practice being Spiritual is only creating an opening for miracles to shine through.
Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value.
Albert Einstein
Emotions: Do You Own Them, Or Do They Own You?
The only difference between joyful moments and others... is you.
One of the most natural and intimate gifts of being human, is our ability to feel emotions. Feelings are here to guide and serve us on this journey called life. Emotions are our navigator in the dark. When used properly they are our most powerful resource; but when they are allowed to use US…they can seem to be our worst enemy.
As humans, we have the ability to create a thought process after feeling an emotion. It is what happens within those after thoughts that determine if you consider a feeling to be good or bad. After your initial judgment has been made, your mind believes it to be true and continues to create even more of it.
Surely you have heard the old adage, “People are not born with an instruction manual”. Although this may be true, our feelings are the closest thing you can get.
Unfortunately, because of this missing manual, we have learned to misuse our inner compasses. We have gotten lost in the endless stream of thoughts that are being created by our emotions. Depression and darkness, both within and around us has spiraled out of control in the wake of all our confusion.
But after all, it’s not our fault, right? If there were no teacher, how could we learn? Emotions 101 was not on the roster when I went to school.
As history unfolds, we are witnessing the evolution of mankind and in that; we are writing this manual that generations to come will so desperately need.
There is no excuse these days to continue to be ignorant of our feelings and our reactions to them. With access to the internet you can learn about whatever it is that your little heart desires, within moments. The small world of Quantum Physics alone has been throwing open countless doors that have been nailed shut to us for years. Doctors and scientists alike are being amazed daily as they continue to dive into the unknown.
But before we can truly master our universe, we must first master ourselves.
The biggest mistake in the mainstream belief system today is that we are the product of our environment, when the opposite actually holds true. We create the world we share from the inside out, not from the outside in. Believing this statement then would conclude why we are all seeing so much hatred and chaos in the streets, it’s only a mirror of our very own confused, collective minds.
We live and experience life in a world of opposites. We would not know light if we didn’t first know dark, we would have no good if there were no such thing as bad, no sweet if it weren’t for the sour, no up or down, no left or right…people need a comparable for life to make any sense.
When it comes to emotions, we have learned to stuff them, keep them hidden away for nobody to see, sometimes not even by you. Not dealing with our negative feelings was a survival technique in a world of thieves and evil. But as our world changes we are beginning to see a better way, the opposite way, to feel and use our emotions to help us grow.
Humans have been doing unimaginable harm with the art keeping their feelings under lock and key. Instead of wasting so much energy trying NOT to feel our feelings, we should be experiencing them. After all, we have them for a reason. How did we ever miss that?
We are all born with the ability to feel emotions, so why do we spend most of our days trying to avoid them? Our true power actually lies in the feeling, using them to our benefit or deciding to release them if we determine they are unwanted. Free will points to this truth, we always have choices no matter what.
We have to take responsibility for ourselves if we ever want to survive as a species. When we do learn how to constructively use our emotions as a positive navigation system, then and only then will there be hope for us to do what we came here to do.
There are many practices out there that help people everyday learn about their own emotions, how to deal with them, how to change them, how to understand them and what they are trying to tell you. Most importantly of all, we must understand how to let them go.
Our emotions and feelings are a type of energy system. The longer we hold on to and analyze them, the more energy we add to them. The key is to feel that energy system the moment it occurs, and decide whether you want to expand on them or to let them flow out of you, verses carrying all of them around with you like luggage.
The secret to ‘finding yourself’ isn’t in where you have traveled or the people you know, or even in the books you read. Finding yourself is to look right under your own nose, to your heart. Look within and find all the peace, harmony and joy you can ever imagine.
We are all here to experience the joy of life as it unfolds – the rewards are not hidden at the destination, they are found throughout the Journey itself.
One of the most natural and intimate gifts of being human, is our ability to feel emotions. Feelings are here to guide and serve us on this journey called life. Emotions are our navigator in the dark. When used properly they are our most powerful resource; but when they are allowed to use US…they can seem to be our worst enemy.
As humans, we have the ability to create a thought process after feeling an emotion. It is what happens within those after thoughts that determine if you consider a feeling to be good or bad. After your initial judgment has been made, your mind believes it to be true and continues to create even more of it.
Surely you have heard the old adage, “People are not born with an instruction manual”. Although this may be true, our feelings are the closest thing you can get.
Unfortunately, because of this missing manual, we have learned to misuse our inner compasses. We have gotten lost in the endless stream of thoughts that are being created by our emotions. Depression and darkness, both within and around us has spiraled out of control in the wake of all our confusion.
But after all, it’s not our fault, right? If there were no teacher, how could we learn? Emotions 101 was not on the roster when I went to school.
As history unfolds, we are witnessing the evolution of mankind and in that; we are writing this manual that generations to come will so desperately need.
There is no excuse these days to continue to be ignorant of our feelings and our reactions to them. With access to the internet you can learn about whatever it is that your little heart desires, within moments. The small world of Quantum Physics alone has been throwing open countless doors that have been nailed shut to us for years. Doctors and scientists alike are being amazed daily as they continue to dive into the unknown.
But before we can truly master our universe, we must first master ourselves.
The biggest mistake in the mainstream belief system today is that we are the product of our environment, when the opposite actually holds true. We create the world we share from the inside out, not from the outside in. Believing this statement then would conclude why we are all seeing so much hatred and chaos in the streets, it’s only a mirror of our very own confused, collective minds.
We live and experience life in a world of opposites. We would not know light if we didn’t first know dark, we would have no good if there were no such thing as bad, no sweet if it weren’t for the sour, no up or down, no left or right…people need a comparable for life to make any sense.
When it comes to emotions, we have learned to stuff them, keep them hidden away for nobody to see, sometimes not even by you. Not dealing with our negative feelings was a survival technique in a world of thieves and evil. But as our world changes we are beginning to see a better way, the opposite way, to feel and use our emotions to help us grow.
Humans have been doing unimaginable harm with the art keeping their feelings under lock and key. Instead of wasting so much energy trying NOT to feel our feelings, we should be experiencing them. After all, we have them for a reason. How did we ever miss that?
We are all born with the ability to feel emotions, so why do we spend most of our days trying to avoid them? Our true power actually lies in the feeling, using them to our benefit or deciding to release them if we determine they are unwanted. Free will points to this truth, we always have choices no matter what.
We have to take responsibility for ourselves if we ever want to survive as a species. When we do learn how to constructively use our emotions as a positive navigation system, then and only then will there be hope for us to do what we came here to do.
There are many practices out there that help people everyday learn about their own emotions, how to deal with them, how to change them, how to understand them and what they are trying to tell you. Most importantly of all, we must understand how to let them go.
Our emotions and feelings are a type of energy system. The longer we hold on to and analyze them, the more energy we add to them. The key is to feel that energy system the moment it occurs, and decide whether you want to expand on them or to let them flow out of you, verses carrying all of them around with you like luggage.
The secret to ‘finding yourself’ isn’t in where you have traveled or the people you know, or even in the books you read. Finding yourself is to look right under your own nose, to your heart. Look within and find all the peace, harmony and joy you can ever imagine.
We are all here to experience the joy of life as it unfolds – the rewards are not hidden at the destination, they are found throughout the Journey itself.
Defining Your Relationships
Relationships are a very important part everyones life. They are a fulfilling of needs. If a certain relationship makes you feel good, then your specific needs are being met by the other person. If a relationship makes you feel sad, causes negative feelings or brings you down, then your needs are probably not being met and changes will have to be made.
It’s time to take a serious look at your relationships. Take care of the good ones, nurture them and they will grow even stronger then they are now. If the not so good ones go unchecked, then you can be doing more harm to yourself then good.
There are as many different relationships as there are people, but for now let us look at the top 4. Love Relationships, Relationships with friends, Physical Needs Relationships and the relationships you have with strangers.
First take a look at your love relationship, the most intimate of them all. When it comes to your emotional state of mind this one effects you the most. If you feel excited, happy and/or energized when you think of your partner, then you can conclude your most basic needs are being met by your loved one. You feel loved and thus love that person easily in return. This is considered a healthy relationship.
If on the other hand you feel drained, nervous or don’t know what to expect when you see your partner, then it’s probably a negative relationship and is taking more out of you then is giving back. It’s harder to truly care about someone when they don’t seem to care about you. When the negative feelings out number the positive ones, then it may be time to consider some important changes.
Relationships with your friends need to meet some particular needs as well. Whether it be a friend who can make you laugh and feel better with their humor, or the friend who is a great listener…you have certain expectations that the other person will fulfill certain needs. In positive friendships, you feel confident that the other person will be there for you. You can tell they sincerely care about you, and of course you care about them and what is happening in their life.
Some so called friendships only add chaos and drama to our life. You probably know someone who is in the habit of looking at the dark side of the coin and seem to relish in negativity. These people can be very damaging and don’t serve anyone for the good. They are takers, and it’s best not to associate with these spiritual vampires. Weed them out of your life as soon as possible.
Your physical needs relationships are, for example, with the mailman, or the corner store clerk, they are there to serve you with certain needs. If they give you good service you feel pleased and will definitely return another day. We all know what happens if the service they provide is not so good, we sure think twice about using their service again, and if at all possible we find someone who provides better service.
Or better yet, the relationship with your boss. His needs are met when you show up to work and do the job he expects of you. In turn, your physical needs of cash flow are met by him. It’s a transaction relationship. When you do a good job, then hopefully, your boss recognizes that you are great at fulfilling his needs and pays you well. On the other hand, if you fail to deliver on his needs you will soon be replaced by someone who can.
The last type of relationship to take a look at is the one you have with complete strangers. Your basic need in a stranger relationship is the expectation that they will be polite and respectful. When this happens there is natural harmony and the conversation flows smoothly. We ‘like’ that person, even though we don’t really know them. But when we run into people who are rude, your first and basic need of the stranger relationship is not met and automatically you feel you ‘don’t like that person’ and negative feelings arise.
When good feelings come up when thinking about someone in your life, it’s probably a healthy relationship - these are the ones that will flourish and grow. If not so good feelings come up when thinking of others, then some basic needs simply are not being met and it may be considered an unhealthy relationship - these have little or no light and will eventually meet their demise.
So what can you do if you realize that a relationship your in is an unhealthy one?
Well, you have three choices. You can completely accept the relationship as it is and understand that the other person just don’t have and cannot provide you with those needs. Take full responsibility for your part in the relationship and stay strong enough not to let their negativity and lack affect you and your feelings.
You could look for possible ways to change that relationship. Look at what you bring to the table and determine if you can give or do more for the other person. In doing so they should give more back to you. You could talk to them. Tell them how you feel, what you need from them and ask for the change you want to see. What happens next will be determined by how much you care for each other. The truth will be illuminated.
If you find these options are impossible, if the other person is just too negative or they are unwilling to change in anyway, then you are much better off without that person in your life to begin with. Sever the ties and move on. Be honest with yourself. You are responsible for your own happiness and if there is a relationship that is doing you more harm then good, then free yourself of that dis-ease. If any relationship is tiring you out and only leaves you feeling bad, then you owe it to yourself to find new friends.
In any good relationship, you will never have to give up your morals or change your standards; the other person will only recognize the awesomeness in you and find ways to expand on them.
It’s time to take a serious look at your relationships. Take care of the good ones, nurture them and they will grow even stronger then they are now. If the not so good ones go unchecked, then you can be doing more harm to yourself then good.
There are as many different relationships as there are people, but for now let us look at the top 4. Love Relationships, Relationships with friends, Physical Needs Relationships and the relationships you have with strangers.
First take a look at your love relationship, the most intimate of them all. When it comes to your emotional state of mind this one effects you the most. If you feel excited, happy and/or energized when you think of your partner, then you can conclude your most basic needs are being met by your loved one. You feel loved and thus love that person easily in return. This is considered a healthy relationship.
If on the other hand you feel drained, nervous or don’t know what to expect when you see your partner, then it’s probably a negative relationship and is taking more out of you then is giving back. It’s harder to truly care about someone when they don’t seem to care about you. When the negative feelings out number the positive ones, then it may be time to consider some important changes.
Relationships with your friends need to meet some particular needs as well. Whether it be a friend who can make you laugh and feel better with their humor, or the friend who is a great listener…you have certain expectations that the other person will fulfill certain needs. In positive friendships, you feel confident that the other person will be there for you. You can tell they sincerely care about you, and of course you care about them and what is happening in their life.
Some so called friendships only add chaos and drama to our life. You probably know someone who is in the habit of looking at the dark side of the coin and seem to relish in negativity. These people can be very damaging and don’t serve anyone for the good. They are takers, and it’s best not to associate with these spiritual vampires. Weed them out of your life as soon as possible.
Your physical needs relationships are, for example, with the mailman, or the corner store clerk, they are there to serve you with certain needs. If they give you good service you feel pleased and will definitely return another day. We all know what happens if the service they provide is not so good, we sure think twice about using their service again, and if at all possible we find someone who provides better service.
Or better yet, the relationship with your boss. His needs are met when you show up to work and do the job he expects of you. In turn, your physical needs of cash flow are met by him. It’s a transaction relationship. When you do a good job, then hopefully, your boss recognizes that you are great at fulfilling his needs and pays you well. On the other hand, if you fail to deliver on his needs you will soon be replaced by someone who can.
The last type of relationship to take a look at is the one you have with complete strangers. Your basic need in a stranger relationship is the expectation that they will be polite and respectful. When this happens there is natural harmony and the conversation flows smoothly. We ‘like’ that person, even though we don’t really know them. But when we run into people who are rude, your first and basic need of the stranger relationship is not met and automatically you feel you ‘don’t like that person’ and negative feelings arise.
When good feelings come up when thinking about someone in your life, it’s probably a healthy relationship - these are the ones that will flourish and grow. If not so good feelings come up when thinking of others, then some basic needs simply are not being met and it may be considered an unhealthy relationship - these have little or no light and will eventually meet their demise.
So what can you do if you realize that a relationship your in is an unhealthy one?
Well, you have three choices. You can completely accept the relationship as it is and understand that the other person just don’t have and cannot provide you with those needs. Take full responsibility for your part in the relationship and stay strong enough not to let their negativity and lack affect you and your feelings.
You could look for possible ways to change that relationship. Look at what you bring to the table and determine if you can give or do more for the other person. In doing so they should give more back to you. You could talk to them. Tell them how you feel, what you need from them and ask for the change you want to see. What happens next will be determined by how much you care for each other. The truth will be illuminated.
If you find these options are impossible, if the other person is just too negative or they are unwilling to change in anyway, then you are much better off without that person in your life to begin with. Sever the ties and move on. Be honest with yourself. You are responsible for your own happiness and if there is a relationship that is doing you more harm then good, then free yourself of that dis-ease. If any relationship is tiring you out and only leaves you feeling bad, then you owe it to yourself to find new friends.
In any good relationship, you will never have to give up your morals or change your standards; the other person will only recognize the awesomeness in you and find ways to expand on them.
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