How To Cope With Stress

By Thomas Carter

Everyone knows that stress is just a fact of life and there is not much you can do about it, right? Wrong, while stress is a fact of life there are choices you can make that will help you deal with the stress. They are important steps to take in order to gain control of your life and to keep from becoming overloaded.

The first thing you need to do is find out what your foundation for the stress is. This may seem simple enough but it really is not. You will often find it hard to own up to the part you play in stress. You probably will not want to admit that you push a lot of the stress on yourself. Take control, you know your stress is not temporary and do not write it off as so. Stop blaming others and take control for your own actions and the parts you play in the stressful situations.

Next sit down and honestly think about how you deal with stress. What are the ways you handle it? Are they healthy or unhealthy? If you smoke, drink, do drugs of any kind, withdraw from everyone and everything around you, or lash out you are dealing with stress in the wrong way and you need to learn better coping mechanisms.

The first healthy way of dealing with stress is to simply avoid the stress you do not have to deal with. Know you limit and do not be afraid to say no if you are overloaded. If you have an annoying friend who adds stress then simply avoid them. If your house constantly stresses you out because of the color or because it is a mess repaint or hire a housekeeper, just take control!

Another thing you can do is just change the situation. First, do not be afraid to tell others how you feel. If you are stuck in a stressful situation do not bottle up your feelings. Learn how to manage your time and be assertive with others. Doing these things will make stressful situations more positive.

Do not be afraid to change if you cannot change the situation. Take a step back and reevaluate the situation. Maybe there is something else you can do or another way to look at the problem. Realize that everything does not have to be perfect and if 99.9% is all that can be done then just accept it.

Stress is a fact of life so relax. While your stress will not go away there are things you can do to take control of the stress. This will make you more happy and in turn will help you relax.

About the Author:

To learn how to avoid stress in life and achieve all your dreams, learn more about NLP Training.

A Homemaker's Social Life

Many people are of the opinion that a woman does not have a job if she is a homemaker and is not in full-time employment. Raising your children and staying home with them will not count as a job, it's not considered employment. They think that stay-at-home moms have an easy life since they don't have to work outside the home and can plan their time as they choose.

 That does not mean it is the truth. Moms and grandmothers are also full-time homemakers most of the time. People don't understand that homemakers have lots of social obligations. Homemakers keep busy with church and other social organizations. This is something that is not exactly important.

A homemaker has many tasks that she does, all of which are time consuming, such as providing a safe and hygienic home for her family, that is the primary task she does. Frequently, she works behind the scenes for all sorts of school performances, acts as taxi driver for her family and fundraises by providing refreshments for various social occasions.

The pool of room mothers usually comes from stay-at-home moms. You will find them going into the nitty-gritty of holiday celebrations, be it red-and-white cupcakes for Valentine's day or red-and-green cookies for Christmas, they see to it that everything is perfect.

As you can see, being a homemaker is very much an occupation. No matter if you work at home or for a company, you will still have the same social responsibilities.



More articles like this found here

Herbs for Depression - Herbal Remedies Natural Antidepressants

Depression can be stated as the sad state of mind that arises from regular worries, stress, tension and anxieties from different spheres of life. Though these are the basic causes, but other causes like pregnancy, failure in examination, serious disease or some accidental events in the family may lead to depression in some persons.

Consequences of depression can not be overlooked as the depressed person loses all interest in his life that may lead to some suicidal attempts and become totally an insane or schizophrenic person.

People suffering from depression cut off all the interaction with the outside world even with the nearest ones. Lacks of appetite or high appetite, low self esteem, sleeplessness, weakness, fatigue are the symptoms that follow depression.

Herbal remedies for depression

Antidepressants are the most commonly prescribed drugs to treat persons suffering from depression. But these drugs are not without side effects which sometimes lead to secondary level of medication. Herbs offered by Mother Nature are very effective in treating depression as they cure the roots of depression rather than the symptoms. Side effects are also observed in herbal treatments but not that of significant value. Still it is better to consult practitioners before going for herbal treatments.

1. St John’s wort, also known as Hypericum perforatum is a well known herb to treat depression and anxiety. It is inexpensive and is easily available and also acts as good sedative lessening the sleeplessness caused by depression.

2. Basil is a common growing Asian herb with lots of medicinal properties and that also helps in stress reduction and lifts the mood.

3. Passion flower acts as a tranquilizer and calms down the nerves by reducing anxiety and insomnia. This herb acts gently and can be given the preference compared to the other herbs.

4. Gingko biloba helps in reducing the depression especially in the elders, whose blood circulation in the brain is reduced. It acts as a good anti depressant and an anti oxidant by increasing the blood flow in the brain and at the same time increasing the memory.

5. Borage leaf juice is another natural anti depressant that effectively treats depression. Being rich in Potassium it stimulates the glandular system and reduces the feeling of sadness, melancholy and pensiveness.

6. Lemon balm due to its soothing qualities is used to treat depression like mental disorders. It calms down the shattered nerves and helps in overcoming depression.

7. Rosemary, if used in sleeping pillows and baths has an excellent effect in alleviating depression as it rejuvenates and infuses a feel good factor in the depressive person.

Apart from minimum side effects the herbal treatments are also very cost effective. Some herbal treatments may demand much more time but weighing the pros and cons the patience pays off at the end.

Read information about Holy Basil Benefits in stress reduction and lifting mood. Also find about Ashwagandha Benefits to reduce stress and anxiety. Know about Aloe Vera Benefits, Cream Supplement.

Feeling Depressed? By Jan Nissl, RN, BS

 

Life is full of changes. Everyday events and our reactions to them sometimes interfere with our sense of well-being and peace of mind. It is common to get the blues or become sad when disappointed. Symptoms of depression are the most common medical problems seen by health professionals. It is estimated that feelings of depression will affect about one-third of all adults in Canada at some time in their lives.

Most people experience feelings of sadness over such losses as divorce or separation, the death of a friend or loved one, or a job change or layoff. These feelings are an expected reaction to a "triggering event," and most people get over them in time.

Several factors increase your risk of developing feelings of depression, such as:

• Female sex. Women are twice as likely as men to experience feelings of depression. Hormonal changes may play a role in these feelings, which may be more evident during pregnancy, especially shortly after the birth of a baby (postpartum depression) or shortly before or during menopause. Some women experience feelings of sadness or depression shortly before the start of menstruation (premenstrual syndrome, or PMS).
• Age older than 60. Feelings of depression in this age group are frequently overlooked because the symptoms are similar to other diseases and problems experienced by older adults. Adults in this age group are more likely to experience social isolation. Feelings of sadness may accompany other life events, such as retirement, death of a spouse or child, or declining physical abilities.
• Personal or family history. You are more likely to experience feelings of depression if you have a history of previous depression, an anxiety disorder, or another mental illness. You are also 2 to 3 times more likely to experience feelings of depression if one or both of your parents were diagnosed with depression.
• Medical problems—such as cancer, kidney disease, heart disease, or Parkinson's disease—or alcohol or substance abuse or withdrawal.
• Stressful life events, such as changing jobs, the loss of a job, or children leaving home.
• Lack of family or social support.

Symptoms of depression that may indicate a need for treatment vary from person to person. If you experience feelings of sadness or loss of interest in pleasurable activities plus 4 or more of the following symptoms for 2 weeks or longer, you may be depressed.

• Changes in appetite or weight
• Restlessness or decreased activity that is noticed by others
• Feeling tired or sleepy all of the time
• Trouble sleeping or sleeping more than usual
• Inability to concentrate or make decisions
• Feelings of hopelessness
• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt
• Preoccupation with death or recurrent thoughts of suicide

People who feel depressed may also have physical symptoms, such as body aches or stomach problems.
Because "mood swings" and other emotional changes are considered a normal part of growing up, depression in children and teens often goes unrecognized. Children and teens do develop depression, and it can affect a child's quality of life. If prolonged or severe depression is left untreated, it can lead to serious outcomes, including suicide attempts and even completed suicide. If you are thinking about suicide, talk to someone about your feelings. If you are not able to talk with your health professional immediately, call your local suicide hotline or this suicide hotline (Canada and U.S.) 1-800-SUICIDE or 1-800-273-TALK or 1-800-273-8255.

The Beginning of Love

The Beginning of Love

Joel Block, Ph.D.

The beginning of love is wonderful. It is the subject of songs and the theme of movies; it has created an industry in fiction writing, the romance novel. But the test of love comes over time, the time beyond the courtship and honeymoon phase. It is in the long-term relationship that our capacity to maintain the vitality and energy of love is challenged.

The Challenge
The challenge goes beyond simply getting along. There are lots of couples who get along but whose relationship lacks spark. Some of these couples have excluded anything controversial from their relationship in an effort to keep the peace. It is a peace that comes with a price.
Not being truly open because it may “stir things up” is precisely the wrong thing to do. The spark comes from being emotionally open in a relationship and allowing the other person to do the same.

Joel D. Block, Ph.D., is an award-winning psychologist practicing couple and sex therapy on Long Island, New York. A Diplomate of the American Board of Professional Psychology, Dr. Block is a senior psychologist on the staff of the North Shore-Long Island Jewish Medical Center and an Assistant Clinical Professor at the Einstein College of Medicine. For 20 years, he was the supervisor of the Sexuality Center at Long Island-Jewish Medical Center. Dr. Block is the author of over 20 books on Love and Sex.

Being Open
Being open requires that we make our feelings known when we talk about things that are important to us and that we stay emotionally connected to our love partner when he or she thinks, feels, and believes differently; we don’t waste our energy trying to change or fix each other.
Yes, creating and maintaining a vibrant love through the process of revealing yourself, warts and all, can be a frightening prospect.

Ditch the Caution
To do otherwise, to play it safe and avoid the risk of being open, or to discourage your partner’s openness because it doesn’t conform to your views is the biggest risk of all. It will, with certainty, drain the relationship and leave it empty. The excitement of the early days will become a distant memory to be mourned. This is so because the liveliness of love relationships, the very core energy of love, is fed by the openness that comes from the heart. Real love involves opening your soul to the person you love.

The Need for Approval
It’s ironic that people who are sharing their lives are often less open with each other than they are with other people who are not as important to their lives. And therein lies the rub. It is because a person is important in our life that we become guarded. Their view of us matters more; they are central to our lives, and we want their validation. We want to avoid their disapproval.
We want them to see things our way, especially those things that are dear to us. If one is excited by a movie, he or she wants the other to be excited as well. If one has a difficult experience and is upset, and the other is not, that may cause a problem; one or both feel the other is reacting improperly. If one feels like sex and the other doesn’t there is resentment.
The demand is, “feel like me, think like me and behave like me.” But we are each different and may feel differently, think differently and behave differently at times. Demanding otherwise doesn’t work!

Which are You?
When I go into a restaurant and glance at the couples, there’s a palpable difference in energy levels. Some couples are animated; others are staring past each other. Often the energized couples are dating and the stale couples are married. The married couples have already talked about the kids and gossiped…there’s not much left they’re willing to get into.
They’re playing it safe—and that is the problem. In order to avoid their partner’s disapproval they’ve eliminated the energy and passion from the relationship. Playing it safe, their solution, has become the problem!

Reach Out
Does your relationship have that dating energy of the early days, or has it been whittled down to topics that are safe? Not sure? Ask your partner!

Two Easy Steps to End The Sadness

Depression is a virus that has quietly invaded your mind. It crept in like a cancer and little by little has taken away your life as you were meant to live it.


The mind is a very powerful creating instrument and a lot like a child. If left unattended, it will run wild and make decisions that may be harmful. If not given proper guidance, the mind will learn to operate on survival  instinct and reactions alone. With no tender loving care and a little discipline, it will rebel.


The brain wires and rewires itself according to our very own thoughts and feelings.
Our thinking causes feelings, and feelings directly affect our brain. I won’t go into the long details, but feel free to check Wikipedia's Chemical Synapse if you wish.

In layman’s terms, depression has been brought to you by your brain, by the continuous accumulation of negative thoughts and feelings over many years. The seed of depression may have been planted when you were very young, or could be the result of a traumatic event. Either way, your brain has wired itself negatively and you are left with a chemical imbalance which can cause sadness, depression, feelings of worthlessness and many other mental and physical ailments.

Here is a video explaining brain function as it pertains to depression.

Being able to rise up, and live a happy life free of depression is not a one time, snap your finger and you are cured type of occurrence. It’s a new way of life; a journey in which you have a golden opportunity to discover who you really are; to figure out exactly what it is you like and what you don’t like.

If you want to overpower depression you should think of it as an enemy. Sometimes the enemy disguises itself as a friend, but the on the first opportunity it will bring you to your knees. You have to get mad! You have to be fed up! You have to get angry enough to take action against it. You have to be determined to take your life back. The intensity of your desire to live a happy life will be the fuel that will sustain you.

So the first thing you need to do is to simply make a decision. Decide right now, deep in your heart that you are taking back your life. You have had enough suffering and you now want nothing more then to just feel better. Decide to embark on a new life, one baby step at a time and promise to never give up on your own happiness. Know that you will win this battle, making depression a distant memory.

After you have gotten mad enough at the monster inside your head, and your mind is made up to live a truly happy life, the next thing you must do is to begin to be your own best friend. Becoming your own best friend is a very empowering process. To be your own best friend should be as natural as breathing, but somehow is not.


Think about this. What if you had to live the rest of your life attached to a clone of yourself? There was no way to escape the never ending chatter. What if everything your clone said, you believed? And the more you believed it, the more the clone would talk about what you believed.

Imagine that person talking negatively in your ear all day, every day. Saying things like ‘forget that! Don’t even try it! You know you can’t do that! Don’t be crazy. You’re not talented enough. Stop wasting your time. Get a real job. Life is about suffering, deal with it!’ How do you suppose it would affect your life?

Flip the coin now. Think of how you might feel if this clone loved you unconditionally. What would be possible for you, if all you heard all day was nothing but loving and encouraging words? Wouldn’t it be better to hear things like, ‘You should try that! It might be fun! You are beautiful and perfect, just as you are. Enjoy the journey of life, what can we learn today? You are amazing, I Love you.’ How would this affect you?

I’m sure you see my point. You are with your thoughts 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You have the choice to keep talking down to yourself, or you can start lifting yourself up.
It’s time. Step up, turn the tables and YOU take charge.

Start to notice how your inner voice talks to you. Pay attention and lead it in a more positive direction. Replace negative thoughts with more reassuring ones and you will begin to feel better and better.

Be persistent in training your mind to join your side. It will resist the change. Becoming your own best friend is like having your own personal loving life coach, cheering you on at all times. There is no replacement for having a dedicated support system helping, guiding, and comforting you along the way.

Can You Feel it?

Every emotion you have ever had has been immediately labeled by your mind, as either being good or bad. From this list, you then choose to either let them flow and enjoy them, or you decide you must avoid them by any means necessary.



Emotions are the biggest part of the human experience. In life, we have to experience emotions completely by feeling them fully. Your feelings are your guide in figuring out life’s game, and to truly get what you desire. Even the negative emotions are imperative to living that happy, fulfilling life you so deserve. It’s sometimes easier to figure out what you want, by first knowing what you don’t want.


When you resist an emotion, or refuse to feel it, you are causing the energy system attached to it, to stall. It becomes stagnant, still energy within and around you. This may be why feelings of sadness stick around much longer then blissful ones.



The inability to express emotions can be psychologically and physically damaging. After all if you tell someone how you feel and they react critically instead of emphatically, you may reconsider sharing in the future. Expressing negative emotions may make you feel guilt or shame, so you cram them down even further. If not dealt with, the negative feelings intensify. Then you begin to see more negative experiences in your life then positive ones. Depression, anger, fear, sadness and anxiety creeps in and you get lost in the shuffle.



Negative feelings can have a damaging impact on your immune system. Certain hormones like adrenaline and cortisol are released in abundant amounts when you are fearful, angry or upset. Too much of these otherwise helpful hormones will weaken your immune system and harm its ability to fight off disease. The opposite is also a scientific fact; that positive emotions such as love, joy and contentment release chemicals within the body that strengthen your immune system. A healthy immune system is imperative in preventing diseases and sicknesses.



Negative emotions have the potential to take over your thoughts and your life. They can impair your ability to think rationally or see situations in their true perspective. The longer you hold onto a negative emotion, the more likely it will become a ‘normal’ pattern of thinking, entrenched in your being. If you continue to hold a grudge for instance, your anger isn’t being released and it may show up as an illness or chronic pain.



If an overwhelming amount of negative emotions are kept bottled up, you may start to look outwardly for ways to be cured. You might use food, exercise, drugs, alcohol, shopping or relationships as your band-aids. Instead, you need to learn to focus inwardly to find the peace and balance you crave.



Accept the fact that your emotions, however unfavorable, are here to stay. You can’t avoid them, so you might as well learn how to work with them instead. You can start by replacing negative emotions with more positive ones. Just by adding the powerful emotion of gratitude to your life can cause huge positive changes to happen.



Life is all about emotions. Any scene or event you have ever experienced can be broken down into many emotional parts. Emotions are simply the physical reactions you have to your thoughts. Your emotions are also constantly changing. One minute you may be feeling happy and at peace with the world, and then you hear a sad story on the news or read a disturbing article in the paper, and your emotions change rapidly to negative ones rather than positive ones.



Emotions are your signs to be more aware of something. They lead you by the hand in the dark Getting in touch with your emotions means paying attention to your mind – body connection. They are also great at helping you decide what you want in life, as well as what you don’t want. Emotions can be fun and should be used as your very own personal guidance system. They point directly to your hearts desires. Listen to your emotions; they are trying to tell you something.



If you are now experiencing more negative feelings then positive ones, then learning a constructive way to release their grip on you should be your priority. Some people use Yoga, Meditation, Aromatherapy, or Prayer. There are many techniques that are helping people rid themselves of unhealthy negative emotions. I use the Release Technique. It taught me how to stop any negativity instantly and now I feel better then ever.



Unless you have the proper guidance, letting go of emotional suffering can be very hard, especially if you have been fighting these emotions for a long time. Letting go, or releasing is something anyone can, and should learn. I don’t mean pushing your emotions away or stuffing them down even further. Your emotions are valid; it’s the feeling of suffering you want to be free of.

Self Coaching Tips that Can Increase Confidence

Image via Wikipedia

Positive feelings of self worth are your most valuable asset. Although invisible, the power of confidence is undeniable. Looking at the causes of low self esteem can lead you to deeper understanding of yourself and improve your self worth.


If you suffer from low self worth, or have poor self confidence, then it will be very difficult to find the peace you are seeking.





Some questions you might ask to determine if you, or someone you love is suffering from low self worth are:



• Do I have an eating disorder? This is western society’s current epidemic; everyone thinks that they are overweight, even those who are not.



• Are you experiencing relationship troubles? Do you have affairs, intimacy problems, or commitment issues?



• Am I suffering from any physical ailments? Chronic illness or pain is a major stress in the lives of many.



• Do I use drugs and/or alcohol to hide from my feelings?



• Maybe I work way too much. This steals time from a very important social life.



• A lot of people’s money goes to the mall; shopaholics are everywhere. Is this a problem for me?



• Why do I smoke? Besides being highly addictive, some people hide behind this habit.



• Am I dependent on others to keep me occupied or from feeling bored?



All of these issues are deeply rooted within our culture. They have become so common that they may be considered normal. Everyone you know uses at least one of these outlets to avoid their real issues.



Your self worth is directly impacted by how you perceive yourself and how you react to those feelings. When you are too critical of your self, you only hurt your self esteem and you’ll find it hard to feel happy and content.



The majority of our problems stem from childhood. Children deeply desire approval from their parents. They want to feel unconditional love at all times. If your upbringing included abandonment, then your self worth has most likely taken a direct hit.



Were you expected to be perfect all the time? Were your parents impatient with your mistakes? If so, you may avoid taking risks now, even healthy ones, in fear of failure or to fall short or what you think is expected of you. You may decide not even to try anything new because your scared you won’t be able to do it perfectly. This only causes regret and adds to your misery.



Having a ‘drill sergeant’ for a parent, one who was constantly pushing, preaching or yelling at you, would also cause painful memories and low self esteem. Growing up with angry parents is very harmful to anybody’s self worth. The child may become timid or nervous around others, or even worse, they may grow up with their own anger issues and act out violently towards others.



Maybe you were neglected by your parents. Not getting the proper time and attention as children can reek havoc on our happiness.



Another problem that’s fairly common is the contradictory or mixed messages you got from your parents. Maybe you were told to follow your dreams, but when you shared them, you were given countless reasons why that would be impossible, and to stop daydreaming. Many mothers say to their daughters, “That boy is teasing to you because he likes you.” What??? This leads girls (women) to believe that it’s ok to be in an abusive relationship. After all, he’s being mean because he ‘cares’ about me.



Conflicting beliefs continually work against each other at the sub conscious level. These hidden beliefs can be very difficult to overcome, mainly because you probably aren’t even aware of most of them. You may want to believe one thing, but your mind is secretly telling you something else.



People with low self-esteem have a vicious inner critic who robs them of their confidence. Low self esteem makes it hard to cope with life and difficult for you to make decisions. Having low self esteem may cause you to be afraid of taking risks or challenges, which you interpret as further proof that you are undeserving or a failure. Since you are in the habit of being so critical of yourself, you become extra critical of others too. This only allows more negativity to creep into your life.



Being mindful or paying attention to your thoughts and feelings is key to self discovery and being confident; as long as it’s done in a non-judgmental way. You need to show compassion and accept yourself just as you are. If you hate yourself all day, everyday, you’re causing toxic energy to become a part of you and every area of your life. Talking down to yourself will keep you connected with feelings of unworthiness. If you keep shoving salt in your wounds, they will never have a chance to heal.



Try to remember the happiest moment of your childhood. Imagine yourself as that child once again. Be nurturing and love that child as you would your own baby or someone else you truly care about. Coach yourself by saying things that make you feel better. Treat your emotions as your child and guide them away from danger.



Intentionally talk to yourself (I mean only in your mind of course) in a way that you wished to be talked to when you were young. Tell yourself you are proud of you! Celebrate that great idea you had. Believe you are a special person and know you have the right to be happy. Congratulate and take pride in yourself often. When you do a good job, make sure you know you did a good job. Mistakes will be made, you are human after all. Understand you make mistakes for the purpose of learning and growing; the next time you will do things differently.



Be sure to cultivate feelings of accepting yourself just the way you are. Don’t beat yourself up if you break down and cry; simply remind yourself that tears are cleansing to your soul. Release all tension during your cry. Let it all out, and then let it go. Remember its okay to have lots of differing feelings, that’s normal. And always, always apologize to yourself when you realize you have swayed off course. Saying sorry to you is a healthy way to overcome any feelings of guilt that you may be harboring.

Be observant and you will learn much about yourself. What makes you who you are? What is it that makes you tick? Realize that you are not the problem, but your old, out dated mind programs are to blame. Like all programs, this one can be tweaked for the better as well. Adding more positive thought patterns to your running program has been proven to help increase your self worth and aids you in overcoming habitual, self destructive thinking.

Using The Law Of Vibration To Manifest Your Vision

Science and Metaphysics agree. The essence of all things is

vibration. Science reveals that everything in the manifest

universe is ultimately composed of packets of energy; quantized

units vibrating at specific frequencies. Esoteric wisdom reveals

that in the beginning, all things were created through sound

(i.e. vibration); whether it be the 'OM' of Eastern mysticism or

the 'Word'/Logos of Western spirituality.



Our thoughts, feelings and actions also have their own particular

rates of vibration. These vibrations will set up resonance with

whatever possesses identical frequency. In other words, your

thoughts are inseparably connected to the rest of the universe.



This is why it is so essential to be a close observer of

yourself. As you think, feel and act, so you create the primary

vibration of your being. This fundamental vibration then creates

resonance with identical vibration frequencies in the universe.

The result is an attraction of circumstances, people, challenges

and opportunities in exact vibrational resonance with your own

dominant vibration frequency.



This principle lies at the heart of visualization techniques,

affirmations and the whole personal development movement. When

you visualize and repeat affirmations, you are helping to tune

your very being to a specific vibrational frequency on the inner

planes. Once that task is achieved, your mind comes into

vibrational resonance with the object of your desires. Being now

of the same frequency, this object (or goal) is inevitably

attracted into your life.



However, for such methods to work, it does imply that you have

changed your core vibration. This is very often the problem AND

explanation as to why such techniques seem to fail for so many

people. Over the course of many years, your inner conditioning is

created from the habitual thoughts, feelings and actions

that you engage in. This forms your self-image and creates the

level of self-esteem you feel. It shapes the way you

conceptualize the world you live in, as well as the way you

respond to it. It is how you interpret your life experiences.



If a person simply mouths affirmations or writes goals out,

without having touched the deep bedrock of their long-term

conditioning, such activities will not have much effect. This is

because the dominant vibration has not changed. You cannot go

against what your self-image, and your predominant conditioning,

say you are.



Thought is where it all begins. As your conscious mind dwells

habitually on thoughts of a certain quality, these become firmly

imbedded within the subconscious mind. They become the dominant

vibration. This dominant vibration sets up a resonance with other

similar vibrations and draws them into your life. This is easier

to understand if you consider that from the metaphysical view,

the whole universe IS MIND.



Hence, to draw what you wish into your life, you should begin

with the mind, and make it your primary focus. Most people do

things the other way around, and come up with practical

techniques to generate their desires, and then go out and try

them. However, when these methods are not in tune with your

dominant vibration, then you will have great difficulty making

the desired results come to pass. You will also feel most

uncomfortable if they do. You have trained your mind in a certain

way, you have set the thermostat at a certain level, and now you

are trying to exceed the limits you have set upon yourself by

sheer force.



The trap most people fall into is that they condition their

future with expectations from their past. It's like driving with

your eyes fixed on the rear view mirror the whole time. You

cannot see where you are going because you are too busy looking

back on past history. Is it any wonder that, for most people, the

future DOES closely resemble the past?!



The problem is that, by focusing continually on what you have

become as a result of past conditioning, you guarantee that you

draw this same dominant vibration into the future. This is also

why your desired future can seem so far away from you. It is

vibrating at an alien frequency and hence, in a real sense, it IS

very far away.



Instead, you have to first change the dominant vibration within.

Once your dominant vibration is in harmony with what you seek,

the latter must literally be 'attracted' to you without excessive

striving! It will seem easy in comparison to what came before. In

a very real sense, you have to become what you seek on the inside

before you can ever have it in physical reality.



There are several ways to gradually change the dominant vibration

of your inner being, and begin to resonantly attract what you

seek. One important thing to do is to have a clear vision of your

life as you want it to be; completely independent of the

circumstances of your present or past. Lack of absolute clarity

about their desired future could well be the number one reason

why people fail in life.





You are creating something new from the universal intelligence,

and drawing it into your reality. You do NOT have to base this

upon the past, your perceived weaknesses, or anything else that

derives from your limited self-image.



A good way to gain clarity is to write down in detail the

attainment of what you seek. What would it look like? How would

you feel if you achieved it? What difference would it make to

your life? It may take you days, or even weeks, to create this

vision, but it is time well spent.



By creating a vision of your desired state and putting energy

into it regularly, you use mind power to shape the very stuff of

creation. You create this imagined 'reality' in your mind to the

point where your subconscious actually believes it to be physical

reality and goes about making it so. It will attract the

circumstances, the people, and the opportunities you need to

bring about the vision you have created.



If you are doubtful about this, consider for a moment that you

are doing this anyway. The only difference is that you may be

unaware you are doing it. If so, your overall vibration is

incoherent, and hence your results fluctuate wildly. By becoming

conscious, you take conscious control of the creative process and

can learn to manifest at will.



Another way to change your vibration rate is to act 'as if'. If

you had already attained what you seek, how would you think and

act? Well, start thinking and acting that way right now. Again,

this helps to impress the dominant vibration you choose upon your

subconscious mind. Again, you have been doing this all your life

anyway. Simply take conscious deliberate control of the process

from now on. For instance, Cary Grant is known to have said:



'I acted like Cary Grant for so long, I became him.'



Taking time to meditate regularly on the truth that all is

vibration, seeing this reality in all is myriad guises, will also

help reinforce it upon your mind - both conscious and

subconscious. You will begin to believe it, and what you believe

is what you act upon.



The reason most people achieve very little in comparison to what

they are capable of is because they have no vision for the future

whatsoever. Focused, single-minded concentration upon a vision

you seek to create is what will actually cause it to happen. You

have to read your description every day (preferably twice or

more), and then vividly imagine it. Begin to live that reality

now in your mind's eye, and you make its future manifestation all

the more rapid. Do not even worry about how it will happen. Just

do your part and let the universe, through the law of vibration,

do the rest.





Copyright 2002, Asoka Selvarajah. All Rights Reserved.

reBlog from thedepressiontrap: The Depression Trap

I found this fascinating quote today:

Do our thoughts cause our feelings or do our feelings cause our thoughts? Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is based on the theory that feelings are caused by thoughts. This seems to make a lot of sense. If we spend all our time thinking that our life is awful, we are useless and nothing is ever going to get better then it’s not surprising that we end up feeling sad, hopeless and despairing. Equally if we think we will succeed, recognize all the positive things in our life and think that things will improve this may help us to feel happy, optimistic and positive. The Depression Trap, Jul 2008

You should read the whole article.